Totally Naked - New Glarus

Vitals:

Name: Totally Naked

Style: Lager

IBU: ??

ABV: 4.2%

Gravity: ??

Purchased at: New Glarus Brewery

Descriptions:

Appearance: Pours a very pale, clear, straw-yellow color with about a finger of bone white head. Decent retention and a thin cap but GREAT (and quite unexpected) lacing. Lots of active carbonation bubbles, too.

Smell: Light biscuit malt and lemony aromas here...some herbal/floral/grassy hops hanging around in the background too. The aromas are faint, but if you really concentrate it is a somewhat complex smell. Lots of lemon, though...perhaps a bit too much as it is somewhat turning me off of the smell. I think I smell a tiny bit of apple too? Weird...

Taste: You really only get a brief taste...some lemon and a tiny bit of malt...this is an extremely boring beer. This tastes like a step up from Miller Lite...not complex at all, which is disappointing considering the smell was somewhat promising.

Mouthfeel: Extremely light, with adequate carbonation and it's not quite as thin/watery as a lot of domestic lights. 

Overall Grade: C-

Comments: This is simply a very slight upgrade (in taste and experience) over domestic light macro brews...however, it comes with a corresponding jump in price. For my money, all else equal, I would buy a case of cheaper Miller Lite over this if I truly wanted something this light. The best reason to buy this is that it's a not-terrible tasting sessionable beer and it supports local business.

Cheers,

Hurls

Harp Lager - Guinness Ltd.

Vitals:

Name: Harp Lager

Style: European Pale Lager

IBU: ??

ABV: 5.0%

Gravity: ??

Purchased at: Trixie's Liquor

Descriptions:

Appearance: Pours a pale gold or light yellow. Lots of visible carbonation and lots of head (1.5 fingers worth). The cap was very weak but, very surprisingly, the lacing was absolutely awesome. Very unexpected indeed.

Smell: Not much here, really. You get some sweet malt and a little bit of grassy hops maybe? BORING!

Taste: You get this weird skunky taste from the outset with a tiny bit of sweet/grainy malt. Finishes with a strong and lasting blast of citrus (lemon, specifically) taste that isn't a detractor, but doesn't improve the beer either. Nothing about this sticks out as being great, or even good. This is a very boring beer.

Mouthfeel: Very very very light bodied; you could drink this all day if the taste appeals to you. This beer actually leaves a bit of a lingering feeling on your mouth. It's adequately carbonated, even excessively bubbly to an extent.

Overall Grade: D+

Comments: For my money I'd rather have a Bud Light or Miller Lite over this (not Coors Light, though). Doesn't leave me with any good impressions; just a boring macrobrew owned by Guinness. I would definitely avoid this one. If you're looking for drinkability and don't care about taste, get one of the aforementioned light beers. If you want something that's tasty (if I am going to drink a beer that is 5% ABV as opposed to a 4.2%ish of a light beer I am going to want something that's tastier) then you should look elsewhere.

Cheers,

Hurls

#9 - Magic Hat

Before this post I have a few small comments. 1.) I have known a good deal of people to enjoy this beer, so I figured I should give it a try. 2.) Magic Hat calls this a "not quite pale ale"...not sure what that means but it should be interesting in some way. 3.) Really Magic Hat...REALLY? Your website is MagicHat.net...a quick google search doesn't seem to indicate that magichat.com was taken...soooooo....WTF mate? Anyways...as Michael Bolton says in the Lonely Island "Jack Sparrow" video..."now back to the good part!"

Vitals:

Name: #9

Style: American Pale Ale

IBU: 20

ABV: 5.1%

Gravity: 11.8 deg. Plato

Purchased at: Trixie's Liquor BYO 6-pack

Descriptions:

Appearance: Pours a brilliant copper color with about half a finger of head. Pretty clear beer with light carbonation bubbles. The head flees the scene immediately but leaves a nice thin filmy off-white cap on the beer. Slight lacing here, but not much.

Smell: Fruity, mostly. Apricot and peaches on the nose; you get a very slight whiff of pale malt, but almost no hops whatsoever. Judging from the smell and the IBUs I expect this to be a fruitier ale than an APA; don't expect much hop bite, which is disappointing.

Taste: This tastes like someone mixed a mildly disappointing APA with a fruit beer. This is a perfect example of a beer that just doens't come together well. The peach doesn't come through; you get some apricot but it doesn't mesh well with the malt really and you get some hop bitterness at the end with virtually no good hop flavor. You get some piney notes, but not much else. The after taste is pretty awful; soapy and metallic.

Mouthfeel: Very light beer, but not a lot of carbonation. You don't get a good hop flavor like I mentioned, but you get a scraping sensation on your tongue and the feeling sticks with you.

Overall Grade: D

Comments: I was looking forward to this because I'd heard a lot of people who liked it. This beer sucks (IMHO); some beers come together so well and others just don't. It's hard to describe, but you get it in the experience of drinking it. This beer just does not come together at ALL. I would avoid this at all costs if you can help it...

Cheers,

Hurls

Summertime - Goose Island Brewing Company

After scrubbing my palate of the Wild Blue fiasco that just occurred (see previous post) I decided to try a little redemption in the form of a summer beer that shares the season's name. First Goose Island to be reviewed and I would like to give a special thanks to Sarah W. for leaving this behind after our BBQ :-)

Vitals:

Name: Summertime

Style: Kolsch

IBU: 20

ABV: 4.7%

Gravity: ??

Purchased at: Left behind after BBQ

Descriptions:

Appearance: Beer pours an enticing golden yellow, with plenty of carbonation drifting quickly to the top. This is a welcome sight, and Kolsch is a good choice, as I've been drinking mostly wheat (i.e. hefe) summer beers, so it'll be nice to have something a bit more filtered, less cloudy, etc.

Smell: Nice citrus-y and grassy smells with a hint of bread from the grain they've used here. Smells like most Kolschs I've had, nothing really stands out here but it seems that this will be a solid beer.

Taste: Grainy/bready and malt flavors stand out here with some lemon tartness. There's a faint taste of grassy hops on the back-end, but obviously hops are not the focus of a Kolsch so it's an appropriate level. This beer is not very complex but has a nice balance to it and certainly does justice to the style.

Mouthfeel: Light and carbonated on the palate with a nice crispness to it. There's a minimal bite, but nothing too noticeable in that department. This is a very light-bodied drinkable beer.

Overall Grade: B

Comments: This is a very drinkable beer for your various summer festivities - it would be good on a boat while you're enjoying the water or out at a BBQ just getting some sun. More so than hefeweizens, which are heavier in body and typically with a yeastier and breadier taste, this beer could be enjoyed all day long. You get what you expect here, with nothing particularly eye-opening, but a pleasant tasting beer nonetheless. Make sure to keep drinkability in mind here; if I'm doing less than 3-4 beers I'm probably going with a hefe to grab the good flavors, but if I'm going to be out all day enjoying the weather and some beer with friends this is a solid choice to roll with. Happy drinking!

Cheers,

Hurls

Cream City Pale Ale - Lakefront Brewery

Vitals:

Name: Cream City Pale Ale

Style: American Pale Ale

IBU: ??

ABV: ~5.7%

Gravity: ??

Purchased at: The Old Fashioned (BYO 6-Pack)

As with many beers, the more detailed stats (IBU, Gravity) are nowhere to be found on this one. Not much of a real concern, just bothersome to me.

Descriptions:

Appearance: Pours quite a bit darker than I expected, without much head (what was there left very quickly), which was bone white in color. The beer itself is amber-ish as you can see in the picture, maybe a dark copper.

Smell: The smell on this beer is EXTREMELY weak; I could barely even pick up a hint of anything. It seems to be a bit citrus-y and maybe slightly floral. When you think of pale ales (or at least when I do) I think of a huge aroma that leaves your mouth watering...this doesn't quite do it for me but obviously I will give it a shot.

Taste: The beer comes across very sweet from the outset and then has a slightly citrus-y bitterness that lingers a bit. The contrast is good, but the tastes are not quite up to par for me. There is some sort of unpleasant lemon taste in this beer that just doesn't do it for me. The malts are bland to the point of barely coming through and there just isn't the hoppiness that I'd expect from a pale ale. This beer honestly tastes like the brewer was really short on supplies so he threw in the rest of what he had and then tossed a couple of lemons into the mix. Not a fan. The 5.7 ABV is not noticeable, but if I'm going to drink a lot of this type of beer I'd rather have something that either hits you with good taste and hops or is quite a bit less alcoholic.

Mouthfeel: The mouthfeel on this beer is very watery, an extremely light body and it seems to be quite carbonated. You could definitely sit back and drink a bunch of these on a summer day if you wanted, if you can get by the taste.

Overall Grade: D+

Comments: This beer (I believe) is brewed year-round, so you can try it at any point. I have heard that the Lakefront Brewery tour is quite good and am going to try it out at my bachelors party in a few short weeks. Apparently they give you a bunch of free beer and it's a really good tour. If this beer is any indication, they are shooting for quantity over quality, but maybe I just had a bad bottle. Honestly, I would not have pegged this as a pale ale if I hadn't seen the label prior to drinking it. Nothing really stands out about this beer to me, in a good way at least. I wouldn't waste your time on this one, unless you are doing the Old Fashioned 150 beers Wisconsin Beer Tour - then you have no choice :-P. Which reminds me, I have to drink another one of these for that...damn.

Cheers,

Hurls